Little annoyances

I need 5 minutes to bitch. Then I will move on from this...

Ever have one of those days where all the small things annoy you? That little feeling in the bottom of your stomach and the feeling that you have to paste on a grin? Grrr...Wil found out they are cutting back on hours again...until September!! So not only does he have to work overnights, but 32 hours will be considered full time (and he's hourly...so that is a considerable chunk--can we say 25% less money!!!)...

Then at work it feels as that as I get to know people better I notice distinct "groups" of people that hang out together. I would rather not be in any group and feel a little uncomfortable about the whole thing...I won't go into it, but I just don't like it! It's also way tougher being THE social worker (face it, we are our own group!)

Then I try to call and check on the status of my license...heather had told me that the office had been closed due to a pipe breaking...well, it still is!!! They have been closed since June 13th and there is not official open date posted. So I guess I am waiting to find out about the appeal until then!!!

I am also realizing more and more that although I am SO happy I got this new job, it came at an awkward time in my life...right after my dad died and before I had really "finished" my grieving (I know there is no finish line, but I don't think I had time to really get back to "normal" living before I started the new gig). I'm working on it, but in the meantime I managed to gain back the weight I lost before my dad died, feel more distant from those I love, spend less time with the puppies, etc. I am really trying to get it all back together again...not just in appearances (because I am so good at those and it's my biggest flaw!) but for real. I would just much rather be the social worker for the world and never take care of myself--it feels uncomfortable and foreign to me. Alot of my relationships are built on me filling that role (did I create this to keep my distance and/or are some people attracted to me be I often play the motivator/supporter role?). ANYWAY, I am back to doing some things for myself and working on those pieces of my life that seem to be holding me back or that are unfinished.

Wish me luck...enough bitching...back to the grindstone!